I came across a Twitter feed two weeks ago by the Christian rapper, KB. He shared his thoughts on being a peacemaker v. peacefaker that are valuable to share with all of you. When you address conflict, are you being a peacemaker or peacefaker?
- Peacemakers are flexible and willing to collaborate to find a solution that is best between both parties. Peacefakers only accept their solution and try to get you to agree with their side.
- Peacemakers accept conflict and see it as an opportunity for change. Peacefakers avoid conflict and change their life if things get tough.
- Peacemakers realize their sins and shortcomings, so they ask how they have contributed to a problem. Peacefakers only see others as the problem without assuming they are also responsible for a problem.
- Peacemakers look at We while peacefakers are concerned about Me.
- Peacemakers try to do what is right and peacefakers want to prove they are right.
- Peacemakers apologize and change behavior. Peacefakers may apologize but won’t change their actions.
- Peacemakers aren’t easily offended and are able to overlook small disagreements by seeing the best in others. Peacefakers are petty, easy to offend, and use little problems to justify hating others to feel good about themselves.
- Peacemakers don’t hide disagreements under the rug, they work to make peace. Peacefakers aim for the appearance of peace even if they have just pushed conflict under the rug.
Reading this made me realize that I’m not as good at conflict as I think. I’m quick to avoid conflict and sweep disagreements under the rug. I have plenty of growth and I’m sure something stands out to you as well. Let’s grow together.
There is an art to handling conflict that few are great at. We all witness people blow up at others if there is a disagreement and we all see people turn and run away anytime someone disagrees with them. Handle conflict with grace, see the best in others, and address conflict when it needs to be addressed. Work to be a peacemaker this week.
“Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called children of God.” -Matthew 5:9
I appreciate you.
-JP